How To Be the Perfect Houseguest

How to be the perfect house guest

One of the tips on how to save money while on vacation is always “stay with family or friends.”  This is a great suggestion.  It’s a frugal way to visit a new location and it’s fun catching up with friends and family.   There is also a knack to being a houseguest (especially if you plan on maintaining the friendship or have hopes of visiting again.)

I’ve always loved visiting friends and family when I travel.  I’ve found that staying for an extended period of time, especially in close quarters, can be stressful for both the “guest” and the “host.”  No one wants to be an annoying guest or to end a vacation on bad terms.

Having been both the guest and the host through the years has given me some insight into what constitutes the “perfect houseguest.”  If you’re planning a trip to visit or stay with friends or family, here are some houseguest etiquette so that you keep everyone happy on your vacation.

Tip #1  Discuss your vacation plans before you leave home

Before traveling, ask your hosts if they want you to bring anything special.  My sister in Georgia always requests a certain kind of black licorice candy that she dearly loves and can’t find where she lives.  (I think she looks forward to the candy as much as she does to my visit.)

Tip #2  Take your hosts shopping

Plan a grocery stop to help with the food staples and to pick up any additional items that you may need during your stay.   I’ve always said my teenagers can eat me out of house and home or my littles ones are picky eaters.  A trip to the local grocery store will solve that problem.

Tip #3  Clean up after yourselves

You’ll want to clean up after yourself daily—make the bed, wipe down the bathroom sink, shower, mirror, and toilet, clean the kitchen.  When you leave you should change your sheets.  My daughter-in-law just wants me to put the bedding in the washer and start the machine on the morning of our departure.  She finishes it up.


Tip #4  Bring your own toiletries

Make sure that you pack basic toiletries, like shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, toothpaste, razors, sunscreen, and bug repellent, so that you don’t have to use your hosts’ products.

Tip #5 Make sure your children are well-behaved

Before you arrive, talk to your kids about appropriate behavior.  Remind them to use their manners and listen to the adults.  Many of the same rules from home apply while visiting such as no jumping on the furniture, no running in the house, picking up your messes.  Ask your hosts about special rules that may apply such as making sure doors are closed so beloved pets don’t get out.  Continue to remind your children of the rules throughout your stay.

Make sure your children are on their best behavior

Tip #6  Offer to help

Help your hosts when they’re cooking and cleaning. Even if you feel unsure of how to do certain tasks, like putting away dishes or picking up the living room, offer to help. If you’re really nervous about making a mistake, say something like, “this is how I do it, but do you want it done a different way?”

Tip #7  Take day trips

Day trips give your hosts a break.  Even if you planned this vacation to visit and spend time with your host, chances are that they’ll still need to run some errands or just relax for an hour or two. By planning a couple day trips during your stay, you’ll give your hosts a chance to catch up on their own activities and you won’t overwhelm them with your presence.

I often visit my son and his family during the winter.  The kids are in school and my son and daughter-in-law both work.  By planning a couple of day trips while I’m there they don’t feel guilty about not taking off time to entertain me.

Tip #8  Give you hosts a break

Take you hosts out to a breakfast/lunch/dinner while you’re there to express your gratitude.  Sometimes taking every out to eat can get expensive and blow the whole “frugal” aspect.  Another idea is to offer to babysit while your hosts sneak away for a “date night.”

Tip #9  Come bearing gifts

At the end of your stay, give your hosts a gift to thank them for the wonderful vacation. Your gift could be anything from French-milled hand soap to locally-produced wine/beer.   My hobby (besides traveling) is sewing.  I often make something.  I usually try to make it something practical.Take your hosts a gift

Tip #10  Don’t overstay your welcome

Benjamin Franklin said that fish and guests smell after three days. Try to keep your visits short so that you don’t overstay your welcome.

How to be the perfect house guest

These are great things to remember when you’re the houseguest to ensure that the invitation will be extended again.  With these tips, I don’t have to stress about being a good guest!

7 Replies to “How To Be the Perfect Houseguest

  1. You have nailed it, great tips!
    This reminds me of a trip we took to stay with my husbands aunt and uncle when our youngest was 3. Turns out Auntie has a coffee table covered with china ornaments, a beautiful arrangement which gave me palpitations every time our little one went near. I used to whisper to him every time he was in the room, “be careful, this is all Chiiiinnnaaa” They still tease me about that now and we all talk about Chiiiinnnnaaaa ornaments even to this day (he’s 17 now!)
    Nothing was broken by a miracle so all was well. (The pillows on the sofa were just amazing too and trying to keep them in order was a whole other story!)

  2. Maria, these are great tips. And we have friends, an out-of-state couple, who have this down! They are always a pleasure to have. But they once told me of one thing that’s not on your list. While they might agree with the “fish and company” rule, they also don’t like it when someone comes and stays just one night. She said if she’s going to have to do the whole bed-changing thing, they better stay two nights!

  3. Hi Maria, Great tips! I wish everyone would heed your suggestions! Seriously, people who visit who are not thoughtful of the host may not get asked back! Wish everyone could read this! Thanks for sharing! Blessings, Janet

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